I do not know why I am even updating this post.
I have a lot in my mind, but there is no word to describe or express.
Maybe, everything is destined and fated.
Maybe, the result or outcome would not change no matter what I opt for.
People, do not simply promise just to make that moment romantic if you do not mean it.
You might have said it without remembering, but can you imagine the pain which you bring to the someone who listened to it?
Nobody will blame you for not telling your so -called sweet promises, there is no disappointment if hope has never crossed your mind.
I thought, I am standing strong after so many years means I've done something that I am supposed to do, but I was wrong,
Shadow? Yes, the shadow is haunting me, to everywhere and anytime.
Few years later which is today, is it only me that has memory?
Frankly speaking, I find it unfair.
When people are able to move on without even stumbling and looking back, why am I still standing at the origin?
Sorry, yes I do know that this post is messy, because I do not know how to make my thoughts to be well-presented.
Ohhh, or maybe this is not even a thought, it is all imagination, which I concern and take it seriously, but, people don't.
Am I at fault? Why God torture me like I deserve it?
I thought I will be strong and tough after incident by incident, but, wrong again.
Why am I even complaining now? Crazy. Insane,
I do not feel like staying here, but at the same time, I do not feel like going home,
Yes, the world is not changing, people are. So do I.
Or I should say, when can I be a better person?
To control my mind and emotion better. Perhaps, it takes forever.
What is the point of writing so long? I don't know. I am bored.
I need to make my life more productive. I do not want to stay in my comfort zone for like, decades.
I have too much to worry, to think of, to consider, to decide.
DAMN IT LIFE IS HARD.
Not fully expressing my thought though, I still feel blue.